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A Blind Date
(Davey Jolly)

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Placing your love life in the hands of others can be a daring move?especially in today's age of higher divorce rates and unconventional courtship practices. But as an 18-year-old in 1972, agreeing to a blind date didn't seem like such a bad idea. After all, my ex-girlfriend had recently dropped the bomb that she didn't think we should see each other anymore, and Mary was my cousin's best friend. It couldn't possibly be that bad.
Per the suggestion of my cousin?who was also my best friend's girlfriend?I agreed to go on a double date with Mary. It was December 2, 1972. Mary was walking down the steps from her front porch to the car where I was waiting in the back seat. She was beautiful! She was as tall as I was and petite. Her brunette hair hung down below her waist and had a slight hint of red as the sun was setting. As she walked toward the car, her hair would swish from side to side in graceful waves.
Mary might have been beautiful, but our first date sure wasn't; it didn't go well at all. I talked about my old girlfriend, and she talked about her old boyfriend?probably out of self-defense. While I was at work the next day, my best friend asked me how I enjoyed our date. I admitted that I didn't. He said Mary had said she didn't enjoy our date either.
I'm sorry, but that rung my ego bell. "I'll show her! I'll ask her for another date, and she can tell me herself!" I declared. So I called her up and lied, "Hi Mary! I really enjoyed our date; can we go out again this weekend?"
"Sure, I'd love to!" she responded, obviously lying as well.
We ate dinner at a local Italian restaurant and then decided to go to an outside riverfront park. Wanting to spend some time alone with each other, we decided to separate as couples and walk together along the river. Talking about nothing in particular, we sat close together with my coat around us.
Over the months that followed, Mary and I began to develop a relationship. And then an unfortunate thing happened. Six months after we met, Mary's mother died from a long-term illness. After her funeral, Mary's dad began to talk about moving up to Indiana. As an 18-year-old in love, I couldn't stand the thought of us being separated. So, I began to think about getting married. Being the preacher's son that I am, I had always been taught to pray to God and trust him for direction in our lives. I remember as clearly today as it happened that summer day in 1973. I drove my truck up into my yard, and as I stopped, a strong thought ran across my mind, almost louder than as if a person was talking right next to me. It said, "Mary will love you when no one else will." I took that as the affirmation I had asked for, and the next time I saw Mary, I asked her to be my wife. She agreed, and we planned our wedding to be July 2, 1973.
On our wedding day, as I was standing before the preacher with our families watching, I said, "I do. And then suddenly, I developed extremely cold feet and realized I wasn't ready for marriage. But the preacher was already asking Mary if she would "blah blah blah." She said, "I do," and before I knew it, the preacher said the infamous words: "I now pronounce you man and wife; you may kiss the bride."
Inside, I was battling with myself. Part of me was happy, and the rest of me was angry. I had always been brought up that when God said, "Let no man put asunder," it meant forever. I was now married forever.
After we left the church, Mary and I departed on our honeymoon. Something snapped, and I became extremely angry on the outside. All the while I knew this beautiful bride had done nothing wrong, and I didn't want to hurt her feelings. Now as I look back in retrospect, our honeymoon was the worst day of our ongoing 32-year-marriage.
For our first year as newlyweds, Mary spent it with a young husband that could not?and would not?be pleased. Near our first anniversary, I came home from work and told Mary stories some of my buddies had been telling about theMary began crying, and between sobs cried out, "When are you going to let me be me? When are you going to love me for who I am?"
Inside I heard another voice that said, "If you don't change, you are going to loose her forever!" It was at that moment, that I changed. I knew I needed to become a better husband. From that moment, our relationship has grown stronger and stronger with each passing day.
Thirty-one years later, I can genuinely say that I am a happily married man. Unlike most marriages that start out great and end up bad, ours started out bad and has ended up great.
And this great marriage has given three wonderful adult children.
I am blessed beyond words to be married to Mary. The promise God gave me has been true for 32 years so far. "Mary has loved me when no one else would have."



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