Resumo de Black Thoughts (last Part)

With a little return back, I believe that I did not regret anything in my old life. I was a man who worked without making attention to the alarms that my body launched me. The night before the accident I had much difficulty to sleep, I was all the time awaked and this morning I was not able to take my lunch. During the few hours that I succeeded to sleep, I made a dream which did not have any direction. I was at the wheel of a car; I remember that I did not have any control. The car went more and more quickly on a beaten overland route as that which I borrow each day to go to work, the only difference is that I use a truck, not a sports car.
I understand now that I had had a message, a premonitory dream. I should not have gone on the building site this morning there, but its living should well be earned. I know presently that the dream wanted to say something but before I could not have known that my life was in danger. Even if an angel would have appeared this morning to me, I would not have believed him.
It is once at the hospital that I recovered to think of this dream. I found myself at home with a knee, ankle, the hip, and the left shoulder of piece and I did not take time to analyze the situation well, for me it was only one question of week before being able to turn over about the logging sites. That was not the case, my body was broken but I could relieve me with the drugs which my orthopedist gave me, I started has to suffer from advantage when the mental one flinched. I was not able any more to drive my car, nor hear a noise of machinery which made me vomit. I was taken crises of panic in middle of the night in my sleep; it was so strong which I was not able any more to breathe.

I had never in my life been as deprived, I did not have more resource as a child. It is without telling the physical pain. When the spirit and the corp are sick, the mixture is difficult to live. It is necessary to accept its new condition and especially to accept the assistance which people around want to offer. I made the error to refuse the assistance which I had needed, there are obstacles that a person alone cannot cross.

Time passed since the writing of these lines, today I am a little better because I was caught in hand. I did not do all the work alone, I had the assistance of three psychologists, and I changed several times of doctor until I find the good. I am still fragile physically but I decided to accept that the drugs against the pain help me and that one day the pain dissipates myself I would not need any more. I was registered at the school to go to seek a secondary diploma of study because I had left the studies quite young person to go to earn my living. I am in full formation to become draughtsman out of successful building and I well. I am not yet able to approach the machinery and I do not make any effort to arrive there. Each time I wanted to fight this new fear, I started again the crises of panic.

I must say that nevertheless took four years to me before accepting my new situation, and today still I am not as I would have liked to be it but I comfort myself by saying to me that I am alive. I changed much, sometimes in better but also into worse, and when I realize that my words wound people I tests to pay attention more because I kept my dimensional critical face to what occurs around me. I am still not able to close the eyes on human stupidity. I took a blow of old man but the gray hair never made die nobody and since I moderated my alcohol consumption I have the ideas clearer. In the life, it is necessary to include only one thing important indeed; we are only of passage over ground, as well to leave its trace as a good man there. Before leaving the morning, take time to kiss your children and say has those which are expensive to you how much you like them because one never know what can be living your.. There are no problems which are without solutions.
Look for the assistance, speak has those in which youhave confidence because they cannot guess that something does not go, especially if you continue to make the ostrich. Each one has his chance, is enough to take it with the passage and good luck.

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