Resumo de My Life - Petit Ours Brun

MY LIFE. I shall sum up my LIFE in two words: failure and sadness, from childhood via adolescence through to adulthood. Childhood...: a broken home, a father, a departure, a rupture. I still remember the time when my father left--an alcoholic, but at the same time a kind and gentle father. My mother often asking him, "You have to make a choice, Albert: your family or the bottle?" After thinking it over for a long time, and yet not thinking at all, he made his choice. What more can one say to a man who has so decided... With parents too often forced to make choices my father, for his part, prefered his bottle, living in his own world--wandering around aimlessly, throwing insults; a weak world from which no one, not even myself, has been able to bring him back to this day. When he left, my world changed, classmates who insult you, your father, your family. Too many insults which, when I recall them today, hurt me; injuries, harsh words, frustrating words. " But you have to rise above all that," my mother would often tell me. My mother..., a strong woman, willing to do anything for her children, willing to do anything for their happiness. But how can one expect a child to be happy if life in general does not smile on her? How can one expect a child to be happy if the one thing that she needs is denied her...a whole family. Without exaggerating too much, though, my childhood was pretty fun. Playing, shouting, getting up to all sorts of nonsense, celebrating birthdays, dancing...(Laugh) all this makes me smile. lol... Today, I would say that I have become a woman. After all these learning curves during my adolescence. Tears, wounds, a love lost, a seperation, father and daughter finding each other again, then mother and daughter finding each other again. I would say that YES, I have become a woman.Shouldering her responsibilities, giving the best of herself to get there, going from A to Z in order to earn her respect. What more could one ask for? Right now I would have to say that life is good!! No. Not true!!!! Never at any point in my life have I been able to open my mouth and say that life is good, never. Despite all these wonderful things offered to me, all these great opportunities presented to me, I would never say that life is good. There are some good moments, but life itself isn't all that great. For years now, I have been asking the one whom you call LORD to remove me from this life, to offer my life to someone who really wants to live, and nothing has happened. I'm asking myself whether your LORD exists at all. Is it a sin not to love life? I would reply NO. We all make our own choices; my father chose his bottle: did the LORD stop him, tell him that his children would suffer as a result? Sometimes, when I'm lying in bed, I pray that I won't wake up in the morning, I wish that this life would just end, to not think anymore, to not suffer anymore. WHY????

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