Resumo de Life After Loss

Experiencing loss and grief is never easy. Most people react in different ways. It is always a traumatic experience even though people appear to be calm. Others become hysterical. Some people expect you to be in control and not show any weakness as most men do but it is not normal. It is more normal to show emotion. You feel lost and solitary and as if the world has tubled down and you alone has to weather the storm even though people try to comfort you. It is a normal experience and your are not the only one in the world who would experience it. Anybody can experience loss and trauma. You just have to understand that life in this world is temporary, be it a relationship, job, marriage or life. Grieveing heals the wounds after a loss and there is no set time limit. It all depends on the individaul and how they handle grief inside them. Others are more open. Some bottle it up inside and when this happens it takes longer to heal. Others become very bitter and angry and think it is not fair and until they understand and accept things that befell them, grief and bitterness will not go away. Freeing onself of blame also helps. Losing someone through divorce triggers a feeling of inadequacy and disbelief that it happenned to you. This time the relationship has ended and you don't know how to cope on your own. The procedure for healing is nearly the same with death. Try to remember that time heals all wounds. You need to get used to your situation and be forgiving. If you cannot forgive, you will not be able to let go of the bitterness and anger and move on. You have to take care of yourself as the other half is no longer around. With regards to dealing with the death of a loved one, you would find that when everything is settled and friends and relations are gone back to their lives, the agony of getting through life and loss is unbearable. You find grieving on your own much harder because there will always be memories to haunt you. You have to socialise and seek help from friends and religious organisations that you are part of and call on them now and then. Sometimes friends and relatives find it tiresome listening to you over and over again. Going back to work settles you on a normal routine too. Grief comes now and then and you would find yourself crying but it relesases the pain. Tears are a normal part of the grieving process. The harder things to cope with are the things you did together and you try to do it on your own. Facing up to the current situation and getting used to it would help. Just remember that you are at the point of no return and things will never be the same again. You cannot be dependent on drugs and tranquilisers. It will help for a short itme but soon you have to get by the natural way and take control of your life. Anti-depressants may aid in your recovery process with no negative side-effects. Letting go and tears have a soothing effect on your emotions. Sometimes moving home and familiar surroundings makes recovery quicker as you are in a new environment. But relocating has its problems too as you might feel lost and isolated and away from family and freinds. So there is no set pattern of recovery. Loss of innocence may not be compared with other loses but it is also very traumatic especially at a young age. It can present a deep psychological impact. Opening up helps ease the pain as most young ones tend to keep it a secret for fear of embarrassment and shame. Freeing yourself of shame by telling people you love and trust or seeking professional help will help you recover quicker and be normal as you get older. The body just needs time to unwind and rewind. Just remember that others have gone through the same trauma as you at one point in their life. Always remember that life is full of misfortunes and you are not alone if you feel hurt. Life goes on and you have to get on with life. It is very hard to accept loss, grief and trauma when you are not prepared. Life is so uncertain that you never know what happens. Joining support groups with people who have experienced or were in the same situation as you helps a lot since you would feel an affinity with them. Sharing their experiences will make you more positive. As time goes by things in your life will start to normalise and you may start to socialise again. Socialising widens your perspective and opens up the possibilitiy of meeting someone to replace the beloved who passed away or the spouse or partner you lost. Sometime in your life you would find that all things happen but it is not the end of the road. More roads will open up for you. Life will be full again after the recovery process is completed and you are ready to move on forward. Some people find new meaning in their life after a loss or trauma. Tragedy have opened up new opportunities and a new outlook for most people.

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