I'm Ok-you're Ok
(Thomas A. Harris)
It is kind of a psychological research thesis. However, it is an excellent
work due to the considerable depth in which it examines the personality
development of a child and an individual. It can also be easily read by
a person not very well versed with the theoritical psychology as it
does not rely on too much abstruse terminology.
It divides every person's self into a parent (the admonisher with rigid
beliefs), an adult (logical reasoner) and a child (the emotional
feeler). According to Thomas, each person should have the ideal balance
between his parent, adult and child or else he will exhibit abnormal
psychological behavior.
Taking his research forward, the author explains that every person in
the world falls into one of the following four categories (life
positions): -
1. I'm not OK, You're OK: A person who feels himself at the mercy of
others. They may start to live a life of withdrawal or may try their
best to gain other's approval or recognition.
2. I'm OK, You're not OK: These persons usually turn out to be the criminals. They distrust everyone else.
3. I'm OK, You're OK: The persons who go on living a balanced happy life.
4. I'm not OK, You're not OK: These kind of persons just tries to get
through life and may end up in a mental institution. They have no hope
from life.
The author argues that the life position of a child becomes fixed at 5
years of age, still by sufficient effort a person can give up his not
OK life position and can come into the I'm OK, You're OK position.
It is a must read for every person willing to live a harmonius life
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