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Lying Awake
(Mark Salzman)

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LYING AWAKEA novel by Mark SalzmanSister John of the Cross is the glue that holds together the fragments of our world. Her life is spent in a Carmelite convent immersed in prayer. The stray souls that wander in their existence are led to safe bay by the prayers of this order that is a part of the global community of the body of Christ a spiritual conglomerate of faithful who pray for everyone The nun is touched by a spark of divine grace. At night, in her dreams, sometimes, an intense light of inspiration iluminates her mind and she is one with God. She stays awake to avoid missing the visits of the Lord. Her poetry is popular among religious and seculars. In the courtyard of the convent the sister is one with nature, she says that ?birds are flowers that fly.?The nun was raised by her grandparents on a farm and recalls the glorious moment when as a child she discovers her vocation and ultimately joins the order. In the small community of nuns, She is regarded as someone special, because of her climbing popularity as a religious writer and the hushed secret that she claims to have visions of God. The nun is plagued by frequent headaches and has an appointment to see a doctor. A certain day Sister John receives an unexpected visit. There is a Lady here to see you sister, says the prioress. In the cloister of the lattice booth, separated by the wall, the woman declares her identity. I am your mother she says. Sister thanks the Lord for answering her prayers, she had been trying for years to find her mother and inquire about other relatives, siblings and the like. The woman informs her she does have a brother and a sister. Yes thank you, they are well, sure , maybe one day, we can all get together. The woman stays silent and makes a shocking statement. Sister, I must ask you to do something out of your kindness, I must ask of you a sacrifice. Nobody in my current life knows about your existence. You were the product of a youthful indiscretion, my husband, your stepbrother and stepsister, other relatives and friends, they don?t know you exist. When I received your letters I was in a panic, if they find out about you it may cause incredible pain and unsettlement to my family. I know it is not fair to you, I agree it was a selfish decision on my part to give you up, yet I was young and afraid. I have a family to protect now. The woman is crying. Sister John is speechless, cannot believe her ears, yet, she has made many sacrifices, this is one more of her many acts of selflesness. They part and the secret is safe. The nun goes on after this shocking event, content with the fact that her inner happiness rests on the visitations of the Lord. The doctor meets with her, a set of radiographs is taken and a serious problem is found. Sister John has a brain tumor. Is she really a predilect child of God distinguished from others by her visitations in her sleepless nights? Is it all a symptom of her tumor? Should the sister have the recommended operation and risk losing her interludes with the Lord? In the end these questions remain unanswered, albeit the Surgery is performed and she recovers. The gentle and kind spirit of the nun, permeates every page of this delightful book, we can feel comforted in the knowledge Sister John of the Cross is saying this prayer for us:Dear Lord , please make me an instrument of your peace.



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