Resumo de Managing Sportively

One often hears that team-working in offices can be effective, if every team member works with a sportsman spirit. Yours truly took this statement a bit too literally and mused on what sort of teams and team-members one could visualise in an office environment. Here is a sample of what my weird mind churned out.
1. Tennis Players: They never keep the ball in their court. The buck should never stop at their place. They either pass it on to their seniors (upward delegation?) or juniors. The analogy seems more apt in Table-tennis, with files/notes/memos etc. moving to and fro on tables, just like the ball.
2. Kabaddi Players: They keep on repeating ?I-me-myself? till they are exhausted and are breathless, and then their game is lost. They give their Egos, euphemistic names like self-confidence, self-esteem, assertiveness and so on. They presume that everyone else, adept at using his emotional intelligence, is taking part in a popularity contest.
3. Hockey Players: They always keep a stick in their hands, never a carrot. Seems like they never heard of the carrot-and-stick policy. Though Covey also, in his ?The 8th Habit? would have us believe that this policy is for animals, and we should give more stress on Conscience, or SQ as he calls it.
4. Athletes: They are always in a hurry, no matter what. Most of the times, these look-busy-do-nothing types keep running away from the goal. Problem is that they keep on running even when the race is over. No wonder they are never in line with their team.
5. Cheer-leaders: They sit on the fence and keep cheering and cheering and ch?, always a source of motivation and inspiration through their lectures. For a change, they never do anything though.
6.Chess Players: You are either a pawn or a competitor for them. Choose whatever you like, ?idhar kuan udhar khaai?.
7.Football players: I can only pray for you that you do not get to work with such guys. Three or four of them can be a deadly combination, using you as a football. You complete a letter given by one boss, and the other calls you for the next assignment. You haven?t yet finished it and the buzzer rings telling you that the boss?s boss wants to discuss some IR problem with you and so on and on?.
8. Squash Players: May God save their team-mates, especially if they are within the firing range of these anger-freaks. One never gets to know with them why one is getting the beating. Others are to blame for their every problem-personal or official, and the only outlet they know is to give a piece, a really big one, of their minds to others whenever they are upset. And they are upset a lot.
9. Umpires How could one forget cricket in the country of Tendulkars and Sehwags. Well, the umpires are prone to giving their opinion on each and every matter, needless to say without the same being sought for. And strangely, their views are brimming with negativity. They know what PM, CM, Chairman or a mere colleague should have done in different situations. As someone rightly pointed out, the solutions to all the problems being faced by the country and the world are known only to rickshaw-wallas and hair-dressers. Alas, they are where they are !
So this was what I meant by Managing Sportively. Well, in the end you must be wondering in which category of players do I place myself. To be frank, and without any traces of modesty, yours truly can boast of himself as a jack-of-all and an all-rounder.

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