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My Precious Son
(Mother ; Jeanette)

My precious son, a precious gift within my presence, within my reach ,and with a blink of an eye became a memory.............so suddenly, so unexpected. How could this happen, why..........? What didn't I see, what did I miss..........what could I have done differently to prevent it? Why God..........Why? I ask over and over why Christopher was taken the way he was. He didn't deserve to die the way he did. He suffered all his life, he never complained, and the last waking moment of his life he went unconscious in agony. Christopher knew how protective I was in making sure he had the right doctors, the right everything to ensure the best care possible. The grief of losing my son is almost unbearable. We were very close. We had a beautiful Mom and Son relationship. He trusted me so, and I'm haunted daily with what I could have done differently to prevent his death. What happened to Christopher should never happen to another. I've decided to put all my pain into productive energy. My story about Christopher could possibly help others and therefore make good come from something so tragic. It's interesting, in life he was always helping others. He would do without to give to another, and now in his death perhaps he's able to help also. At age two Christopher was diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis. Life suddenly changed. I found myself on a mission to ensure Christopher would have the best care possible and never let the Cystic Fibrosis get ahead of us. It was years of doctors appointments, learning new routines, taking classes to make sure I did his treatments correctly. Everything and anything I could to keep him alive and well. Christopher did do well. His doctors were always amazed with his progress. It was hard for Christopher, especially going to school and wanting to be like his classmates, not wanting to be different. He coughed alot, had shortness of breath, but he masked it all so well. He never complained. He always told his friends he had asthma. Christopher never wanted his friends to know he had Cystic Fibrosis because he didn't want to be treated any different than anyone else. At age 23 the Cystic Fibrosis was taking it's toll more and more with collapsed lungs off and on , more hospitalizations and finally it was decided he should be put on the national transplant list for a double lung transplant. We made all the arrangements, tried to be prepared, but when that call came telling Christopher the lungs were here it was a whirlwind of confusion. It was an excitement of happiness associated with fear. The lungs were really here. Christopher was flown by helicoptor to the hospital where the transplant team was waiting. I remember looking at Christopher wondering if it was the last time I would talk to him, see him alive. We knew well the dangers of a transplant. There was no guarantee he would make it thru surgery. His girlfriend sat on one side and I on the other. We both held his hands. The time came for him to be wheeled to surgery. It was all I could do to let go of his hand. I kissed him on the cheek and told him I loved him and he said, love ya too Mom. I watched him being wheeled into that long hall until he was out of sight. It was an eight hour surgery that seemed unending. Finally, he was in recovery and I was told he was doing great. We were told he would be intubated and may not come off the respirator for up to a week or maybe longer depending on how the lungs were responding to his body. Within twenty four hours Christopher was off the respirator and breathing on his own. Christopher beamed! His cheeks were rosey and glowing. His fingernails and toenails were no longer that ugly lavender grey color. They were nice and pink. He was so happy, we were all so happy for him. He said it felt good to breathe without trying to breathe. Christopher said he felt like what people who hit the lottery must feel like. I told him ,Christopher, you did hit the lottery,you hit the lottery of life.

My dear son died..splant was so successful that his doctor told us Christopher could have another good ten years and maybe fifteen , and by that time with medical technology and discoveries they may have something else to give him another ten years. His doctors even made him a mentor for other transplant patients. We were elated to have Christopher doing so well. Christopher's dreams and hope for that future were unexpectedly taken from him. Our lives changed forever , my heart broken. Read on for the chain of events that caused his untimely death.

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