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3d Mail: Like E-mail But Stupider

Email has lots of problems these days. Teenagers think it''s old hat. Workers are drowning under a deluge of messages and developing innovative time-saving rules to cope. And all the social traffic has gone to Facebook.

Riding to the rescue comes a product that solves precisely none of those problems and introduces several more. Welcome to 3D Mailbox, a truly pointless piece of software.
It''s a bit like Second Life for email. Your email programme becomes a Miami beach resort. Incoming messages - in the form of swimwear-clad young men and women - are vetted by a ''bouncer'' and then sent to the showers before they are allowed in. Accepted email then dives into the pool, where it swims until you''re ready to read it.
Spam messages, represented by fat men with ''SPAM'' tattoed on their chests, are sent to the beach to be devoured by sharks. "Have fun destroying spam!" claims the site. As if the problem with spam has been that it doesn''t waste quite enough of your time.
Soon, users who are tired of beach life email will be able to transfer to a replica of Los Angeles airport. "See Boeing 747''s, each one representing your incoming or outgoing emails, fly in and out, accompanied by air traffic control chatter, engine noise, contrails and more!" says the site. "If someone in Australia sends you an email, for example, it will arrive aboard a Quantas jet!"
It''s so absurd, so profoundly unnecessary, that I spent a considerable amount of time digging around to see whether it was fake. Sadly, it''s not.

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